Monday, September 10, 2012

Invid's Guide to the Star Wars Universe: Alien Species (#58)

571. Klatooinians. Aside from being part of the The Day The Earth Stood Still in-joke (which annoys me just a smidgen, seeing as how I ended up hating that movie), the Klatooinians made their first contact with starfaring races with the Hutts.

It didn't end well for them, as they signed a treaty that promised they would be slaves of the Hutts forever.

Yeah.

They were signed on to help the Hutts defeat Xim the Despot, among the earliest-living named humans in the history of the Star Wars galaxy and certainly the most historically significant human of his time period. Apparently, their modern culture involves teaching their youngsters that the Hutts are gods, and then selling them into slavery when they reach the age of ten. There are, of course, rebellious Klatooinians, but they tend to get sold into really dangerous positions.

Rating: 3/5. They kind of help make a point I discussed about the Hutts previously, that being that the Hutts are more a remaining government of an old, vestigial empire (and self-proclaimed deities) than actually a bunch of crimelords.

572. Klee. They were rendered extinct by Xim, to hear a Hutt playwright tell it.

Rating: 2/5. I've mentioned that I find the idea of a Hutt playwright rather amusing, I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure I've also mentioned that they're of very mildly dubious authenticity.

573. Kler'terrians. Kler'terrians have four arms and three eyes on stalks. One had a paunch and was a bartender.

Rating: 2/5. Mildly amusing-looking, but kind of... I don't know, I'm not really feeling it, as they say.

574. Kli'aari. Four-armed (again?) and "known" for gentle natures and mechanical skills.

They apparently are widespread through a specific region of space, living in small communities dispersed there.

Rating: 3/5. I like the detail of their enclaves, and while there's no image of them, they at least have multiple described features.

575. Kloodavians. Kloodavians have an amusing name. They can regenerate lost limbs and are among the mind-trick resistant species. They apparently are small, yellow-skinned "reptilians."

Rating: 4/5. A lot of potential, and an awful lot of descriptive stuff in very little space.

576. Kloperians. Kloperians are apparently short, gray-skinned, have fishlike eyes, and have "extensible" necks and tentacles, some of which have hands at the ends.

They have a "natural affinity for mechanics." I think that they could have chosen a better word to describe their natural affinity for mechanical things than "mechanics" because I have a mental image of some being friendly with guys in coveralls.

Anyway, apparently they're good at that kind of thing because of their many hands on flexible appendages and their heads on long, flexible necks. Sadly, there's no pictures.

Rating: 4/5. They sound like they'd be visually interesting. Also, apparently they express indignation by wrapping their tentacles around themselves, which is funny.

577. Kluuzot. Sapient lemuroids from Krann...

Rating: 2/5. ...would be a good name for a rock band. (All we know is that their world was taken over by the Empire, freed, and they didn't join the Alliance-and you need to look at their homeworld's entry, not theirs, to find that out. Dime a dozen, that sort.)

578. Klytonians. Supposedly, Klytonians were in that good ol' cantina. They could talk to each other from across the room despite the din because their scales let them exchange electrical signals from across the room.

What? Your scales don't do that?

Anyway, by some point, their homeworld became one of the many in the "Hutt dependencies," i.e. it was basically something like the Eastern Bloc, but for the Hutts instead of the Soviet Union. (Only not, because of course that's ridiculous. The Hutts aren't really in a cold war with anybody, after all. Don't listen to me, I'm insane.)

Rating: 3/5. A lot of potential. "Hutt Dependencies" would also be a great name for a rock band.

579. Knowledge Bank. The Knowledge Bank is a group of sapient bivalve mollusks that collect knowledge telepathically from the fish of Mon Calamari's (the homeworld of Admiral "It's a Trap!" Ackbar and his species as well as a group of Cthulhu-faces called the Quarren) oceans, and basically serve as a living historical record of everything that has happened there.

Let me rephrase that.

The Knowledge Bank are a bunch of nigh-omniscient mind-reading clams.

The Mon Calamari and Quarren view the Knowledge Bank as sacred, and try to hide its existence from outsiders.

Rating: 5/5. What part of "nigh-omniscient mind-reading clams" don't you understand?

580. Koboks. Koboks are apparently very strong, rather skeletal insectoid humanoids (ha!). They have one eye in the backs of their heads and can see in 360 degrees; they also have a venom dispensed from spikes on all their limbs that can knock out victims for several hours. They apparently have flexible faces that can convey expressions despite their exoskeletons.

Their problems keeping treaties and tendency to take violent professions off their homeworld gives them a reputation for being violent and sneaky.

Rating: 4/5. I've talked a few times about how this group or that group can be excused for being portrayed as "always chaotic evil" or whatever because of their potential for creating interesting stories. I think these guys are among that group.

-Signing off.

No comments: