Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Lessons You Can Learn From Videogames

Pac-Man: Performance enhancement is good. (Power pills.)

Defender: Human beings can withstand giant energy and missile blasts if you merely set the difficulty level to easy. (Atari version only.)

Vanguard: It's simple to engineer a starship with multiple lives. (Atari Vanguard handbook. There's actual story dialogue to this effect in the booklet.) Also, Kemlus snakes are slow-witted.

Yars' Revenge: Being in an exploding starship will turn houseflies into incredible superbeings. (Incidentally, I love that old comic. The art's nicer than it has any right to be.)

The Empire Strikes Back (Parker Bros.): There's actually a reason the big walker that fell down blew up in the movie. (An open bomb hatch, if you're wondering.)

Platypus: A creaking antique fighter can defeat the armies of a huge industrialized nation. (Then again, movies and cartoons will teach you this kind of stuff too.)

-Signing off.

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